The drive home that night was a chance to unwind.  Listening to motivational CD?s or upbeat music would do the trick.  Instead, it was The Who?s ?Quadraphenia?.  A rock opera about suicidal youth in 60?s London?not exactly upbeat.  Alone in the car, screaming every word to every angry, suicidal song changed my mood alright.  I?ve always liked anger better than depression anyway.

 

I said it was a ?chance? to unwind, I didn?t say I actually unwound.

 

As I put my key in the door, I heard yelling coming from inside the house.  Either my family was listening to Quadraphenia too, or my son had another banner day at school.  Ahhh, home sweet home.

 

I was tempted to turn around and jump back in the car again but, against my better judgment, I went inside.

 

?Hello, I?m home!!? I tried to scream over the yelling.

 

The yelling continued but I heard the pitter patter of six feet running down the stairs to greet me.  My 3 year old Labrador Retriever jumped me and my 10 year old daughter was not far behind. 

 

?Hi Daddy! Wanna see my new dance routine??

 

?Sure honey let?s see?

 

Jenny was actually an excellent dancer.  One of the highlights of my year was going to her dance recital.  However, this show was interrupted by Rocky jumping all over her with each new move.

 

?You and Rocky make a great team honey.  How was school??

 

?Good, but I gotta go.  I was in the middle of IM?ing my friends and they?re probably wondering where I am.?

 

She lives half her life on the computer.  It?s a wonder kids ever leave the house these days.

 

It was time to see what the yelling was about.

 

I walked into the kitchen to find my wife Susan and my 12 year old son Bobby in the heat of battle.  This battle, like most, was caused by another rough day at school. 

 

We found out about 4 months ago that Bobby had something called Asperger?s Syndrome.  Asperger?s is difficult to describe but I think it was created to push my buttons and test the limits of my sanity.  It?s basically a high functioning form of autism.  Although individual cases can be very different, Bobby?s issues were awkward socials skills, a very narrow set of interests (T.V., video games and?did I mention video games) and an obsession with his way of doing things.  It wasn?t all bad; he also had an incredible memory, terrific math skills and came out with some hilarious comments from time to time.  Like the time he said a cemetery was ?like a garden of dead people?.  Asperger?s kids definitely have a different way of looking at the world. 

 

It started when Bobby was about a year and a half.  He was way behind in his ability to speak and had a temper so bad he had a black and blue mark on his forehead for 6 months from banging it against the wall and stairs.  Over the next 9 years, he was diagnosed with almost every 3 letter acronym I?d ever heard of.  Issues ran from heartbreaking to frustrating. 

 

For example, last year Bobby put his head inside his shirt and sat in the hallway at school during lunch.  The teachers tried to get him to go back into the lunchroom but he wouldn?t move or speak.  It turns out the other kids were teasing him and that was his way of dealing with it.  Fifth graders can be pretty cruel to someone who?s ?different?.  I know, I was one of those cruel 5^th graders a long time ago.

 

Then there?s the issue of getting up in the morning and getting ready for school.  If we didn?t stay on top of him every step of the way (waking up, getting dressed, brushing his teeth, etc.) he would forget what he needed to do and sit down to pet the dog for 20 minutes.  It was a constant struggle getting him out of the house on time.

 

Like I said?heartbreaking and frustrating.

 

?What happened now?? For some unknown reason I decided to join the battle instead of tip toeing away quietly.

 

?School is soooo boring!  I can?t stand it anymore! The other kids are annoying and the teachers treat me like I?m in jail!?

 

?I know all that? I complained, ?you?ve been telling me that every day for the last 6 years, but what specifically happened today??

 

That?s when my wife jumped in ?Tell daddy what you said to your teacher?

 

?I don?t remember? he lied.

 

?Bobby, I?ll find out one way or another so you might as well tell me?

 

?Okay?I um, told Mrs. Mackay she was a moron?

 

?Excuse me??

 

?She wouldn?t leave me alone.  She kept trying to get me to finish my writing assignment but I had nothing left to write.  I hate writing!?

 

I won?t bore you with the rest of the conversation but it ended with a bit more screaming and three Nintendo-less days for my son.

 

***

 

 ?What are we gonna do with him? Things seemed to be getting worse? Susan said as we got into bed that evening.

 

?I don?t know but, to be honest, I just can?t deal with it now.  I?m living a nightmare at work and that?s not getting any better either.  By the way, that new psychologist is really working miracles with Bobby, isn?t he? I said sarcastically. 

 

About 3 months ago we started seeing our 3^rd Family Psychologist in the last 2 years.  None of them seemed to have any more of a clue than Susan and I did on how to get through to Bobby.  This last one said he?d worked with Asperger?s kids?I guess I should have asked if he actually helped them as well. 

 

?I plan on making some calls tomorrow.  I got a recommendation from ASPEN that I?d like us to check out?.  ASPEN is an Asperger?s support group we?d recently joined.

 

?Great?, I said, although ?here we go again? is what I thought.