LATE FEBRUARY, 2009:  Mike Stearns, a 30-ish San Franciscan with a decent resume and MBA from Georgetown, has been unemployed for months.  His wife - sensing his desperation and knowing, probably, that this kind of situation can wreak havoc on a marriage, takes a bold step and launches MyHusbandNeedsAJob.com.

The site is exactly what it sounds like:  A 6-page website which includes Mike's resume, photos of him standing in front of the Golden Gate Bridge (holding a sign saying "I need a job!", no less), a YouTube video, and more personal information about Mike than you ever wanted to know.

MARCH, 2009:  The gimmick is irresistible to the media, who are by this point sick of writing human interest stories about people losing their jobs, and are turning their attention to slightly more hopeful stories. 

The site takes on a life of its own and soon Mike and his wife are on Oprah.  The website traffic spikes so dramatically that they put Google AdWords on it and Mike tries to keep up the momentum by writing regular blogs about his job search.

MAY, 2009:  Only one blog post, but it's all about how Mike's getting lots of interviews, so it's fairly positive.

JUNE, 2009:  Still no job, and with blog entry titles like 'Another week down', it's clear that poor Mike is discouraged, depressed, and having to put up a valiant fight to avoid sounding desperate. 

JULY, 2009: Still unemployed, still in the interview process (and still getting enthused about 'in-person' interviews, which tells me he hasn't had a heck of a lot of applications go beyond the phone-screen stage) - and total silence since July 7.

(I'm pretty sure that this means he's still unemployed, because otherwise he'd announce it on the site, if only to attract media attention, because that would generate increased site traffic and more AdWords revenue for poor Mike and his wife.)

The whole thing is kind of heartbreaking, actually:  You can't help feeling sorry for Mike and his wife.

But here's the thing:   Feeling sorry for someone and wanting to hire them are pretty much mutually exclusive.  A tragic story might get you a pity date or even pity sex - but it's not going to get you a six-figure salary at a Big 5 consulting firm (typically the employers of choice for MBAs from US tier-1 schools).

And while the website was kind of a neat gimmick at first, now it just makes you think:  "This guy got huge media coverage - I mean, he got on Oprah for godssake - and he still hasn't landed a job in the past 5 months?  There must be something wrong with him."

I think I know what it is, too:  I'm 99% convinced that Mike is one of those stereotypical MBA types who're great at putting together 100-page PowerPoint decks complete with interactive diagrams but don't have an entrepreneurial bone on their bodies and think that getting an MBA from a good school was all the initiative they ever needed to take. 

(I'm assuming here that it was in fact Mike's wife who set up the site, and that it wasn't just a ruse.)

Why am I so sure Mike's just a plodder?

Because he's totally wasted this huge (HUGE!) opportunity.

Instead of squandering all the site traffic on faux-interview vaporware statements like "I think the culmination of my education and experience has put me in a great position to succeed immediately..." and poorly-written, virtually contentless blog entries like "Fun 4th Vacation on the cheap!", Mike could have used his 15 minutes of fame to establish a value proposition, a brand positioning - and probably even some consulting work!

As it is, he leaves you with the impression that he's just another clueless MBA who wouldn't know an ROI if it dropped on his head like a Hefty bag full of soup - and that of the two of them, it's his wife who's most likely to deliver value to your organization, because she's the one with ideas, initiative and moxy.

Um...tell us again why you just spent 700 words on this topic, Sarah...

Tragically, I have no idea.  I guess it's because in any given week, I see/hear from so many people who are out of work and doing what they think are all the right things in order to get a job, but just don't seem to be able to get past the preliminary interview stage.  And I know how upsetting, stressful and demoralizing the process can be.

But I also know that 99.99% of the time, gimmicks not only don't work, but also end up backfiring - leaving the job-seeker bewildered and bitter.

So I guess all I really wanted to say is this:  "If you're a job seeker, your #1 priority should be to build and maintain a personal brand.  Potential employers need to know exactly what value you bring to the table - and they don't have time to read 5 pages of copy on a website.  What effect(s) will the 'gimmick' you're considering have on your personal brand in the short- and long-term?  And remember that when it comes to getting a job, not all PR is good PR."